30 Important Lessons I’ve Learnt As A Parent

[30 Lessons I've Learned From Being A Parent]

30 Lessons I’ve Learned From Being A Parent

Here are 30 of the most important lessons I have learnt as a parent.

They are not in any particular order & they are not an immediate recipe for success.

They are from the lessons I’ve learned, in my situation, through making plenty of mistakes & learning along the winding road that is parenthood.  It’s hard work requiring time & commitment; none of us are really prepared for what we take on when we start our parent journey.

And if you’re not a parent, many of these are also a good foundation for any relationship we develop 🙂

  1. There is no single instruction manual for being a parent in your particular situation
  2. Listen to & learn from others about their experience but don’t slavishly do the same as them; your situation is not the same
  3. Quality Time is a myth created by adults. Children want time, time, time with their parents
  4. Tell your children how much YOU love THEM; they can’t osmose this information & rarely assume it
  5. Tell your children how valued they are as individuals & not just because they’re good at maths, sport or whatever
  6. Set your children an example.  Easier said than done but very powerful; most want to be ‘like you’
  7. Realise children are a gift; you don’t deserve them & they didn’t ask to be here
  8. Recognise that you make mistakes & apologise to your children when they are victims of your ignorance or stupidity 🙂
  9. Set yourself reasonable targets that can be achieved
  10. Never underestimate the power & value of friends to whom you can talk & with whom you can share concerns, experiences etc
  11. You will make mistakes
  12. Avoid undermining the confidence of your children: be careful with what you say & HOW you say it.  Words can be killers
  13. Demonstrate physical affection: hugs & kisses work wonders in children of all ages (& I include adults here too)
  14. If your child has taken the time to make something, or do something for you, or to tell you about their achievement, listen, respect & praise them.  Too many of us grow up missing the value & liberation of praising others.  They also feel valued
  15. Remember, when the shit hits the fan, there is a way through; it’s just not always immediately visible or evident
  16. Always show gratitude when receiving presents from your children, no matter how small they are
  17. The amount of love & attention you show your children is far more valuable than the price tag on a gift you buy them
  18. Always leave the door open for them to come to you, even when the going is tough
  19. Sometimes saying nothing is far more valuable than giving your opinion
  20. Children are for life, not just whilst they’re babies or toddlers. As a parent we have a massive influence on the adults they grow into, even if we go through the fires & hard times to get there
  21. You don’t know everything
  22. Love is spelt T-I-M-E
  23. Be yourself & be comfortable with that. We cannot be anyone else, no matter how much we may wish. But as such, we are ideally equipped for our own situation 🙂
  24. Learn the art of being a good listener: We have two ears & 1 mouth; use them in that proportion.
  25. We can learn as much from our children as they can learn from us
  26. Sorry is often the glue that bonds you to your children
  27. Take time to make your children feel special: as they get older, take them out for a meal or a walk or a ride
  28. Take an interest in your child’s activities: you may not be able to do the same or fully understand it, but you can add to their sense of achievement
  29. Our children do make mistakes, even if that comes as a surprise 🙂
  30. You will always be their mum or dad but value that, don’t abuse it. As children grow older they also start making their own decisions & it can be so much harder to help if you have no close relationship with them.

Be encouraged; we all carry L-Plates for our time as a parent & I believe, as friends!

Until next time …


About waywood

Hi & Welcome to my thoughts. I share subjects that are important to me. As you’ll notice, these subjects can be quite broad & varied. I like variety; I like breadth & I like a challenge. I am passionate about helping others overcome their fears, grow in confidence & succeed. Although many people would label me as an achiever, I have battled low confidence, low self-esteem & a couple of nasty, long periods depression over the years. I can’t say, “I know how you feel” but I can hopefully empathise & offer some of the things that are helping me to turn my life around. Please feel free to comment, share & enjoy. Take care, best wishes & keep well Stuart
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