If you have ever suffered from low self-esteem, depression or low self-confidence, you will know how easy it is to see unreality!
I read a great quote the other day which went something like, “If I think hard enough I can see problems that don’t exist.”
I don’t advocate going through life without thinking; the results could be disastrous! However, I do encourage you to look at the evidence that supports your view & see if any exists.
Let me give you a personal example:
I have recently been struggling with very low mood & when this happens it is easy to see the worst in things. I often joke that the standard depressives response to “You look great today!” is “So what was wrong with me yesterday?”
I am a character who thinks (too) long & (too) hard about many things, frequently convincing myself that I’m right!
Last week I had the privilege of playing in a band on Main Stage at a UK festival. The day went really well; we played well; listened to some other great bands; had brilliant weather & I came away still with some money still in my wallet! The staff at the festival were great; very welcoming & friendly. This was especially true of the Mainstage managers & sound guys who all did a great job.
But one lady who I stopped to speak to on a number of occasions said something very significant for me:
“Thank you for spending time talking to us & showing an interest in us.”
To say this was a tonic is an understatement. For a long time I have been unable to gauge exactly where I am mood-wise & along with that has gone the thought that I’ve become quite distant, unfriendly & just a bit boring to be with.
That was my ‘Reality‘ but it took someone else to take time to unknowingly challenge my thinking with evidence that told me something different. I hadn’t done anything special; I hadn’t asked for feedback; but what I got was a pointer that my sense of reality is not always the same as the real thing.
I’m very thankful to the lovely lady from Stafford who made that throw-away comment & reminded me to listen to what others say, as they may just say something that is very enlightening & more than a bit encouraging.
It also reminded me of how much my words can mean to others, for bad & good, though I hope it’s more for good.
Until next time …