‘Once in a Lifetime Offer!’

I read the other day that over 89% of the business books that people purchase and download go completely unread.

Of the remaining 11%, only 1% of those who read the book will actually implement any of the ideas they find in the book – even if they are well aware that doing so will cause immediate and drastic improvements in their lives.

And of that remaining 1% who attempt to use the ideas, an even smaller percentage will use the ideas correctly.

So, the average person has less than a 1% chance of benefiting from any book they download or buy.

I was staggered.  But then, after thinking about myself, I wasn’t quite so surprised.

The power of marketing is to prompt the ‘impulse buy’.  People pay professional copywriters hundreds, even, thousands of dollars to write compelling script that leads us to the big sell; making a decision to buy. And before we know it, our credit card is debited!  They know the power of words, images and a compelling argument. 

And clearly, for the majority of people this tactic works. 

We buy some low-cost product that we promptly forget about, whilst the seller repeats the process to hundreds or thousands of visitors … and makes a very healthy profit … mainly on people’s impulse buying.  We think, “I can’t do without this”  when clearly we can, or there would be a much greater percentage of people who would digest and apply every last morsel of information from those unread business book downloads!

In a world of ever-increasing speed and convenience, increasing pressure to possess and have, increasing messages of “You’re not successful in life unless …” it is little wonder that so many are drawn in by these ‘Once in a Lifetime’ offers.  We’re afraid of losing out or missing a bargain, when in reality, we’re spending money and gaining nothing … and in the process we join the queues of people on the credit and debt trap.

“Buy now; pay later”.  We’ve all heard it.  But if we haven’t got the money now, will we have the money when the bill comes through in 12 or 18 months?  It’s easy to think “Yes, of course we will!”  Unfortunately, if we fall for the salesman’s slogan once, there’s a good chance we’ll fall for it again.  So, in 12 months we don’t have one item to pay for; we have two, three, five, ten …  and at that point we’re stuck.

I don’t honestly have many real answers to this, and I’m certainly no financial expert, but I would like to share with you some principles that I try to apply and have worked for me.  So please, make of them what you will:

1. Whenever possible I pay in full at the time of purchase.  If I use a credit card I always try to transfer money from a bank or building society account to the card and pay it off.  Yeah! I know the economists will tell you this is ‘bad practice’ because you lose the interest on your money, but honestly, unless we’re talking about thousands of pounds, a couple of weeks interest on a hundred or even a thousand pounds is worth nothing compared to our peace of mind.
2. If I feel that I’m being drawn into a sale I’m unsure about I either make sure I have some time to think (the salesman worth his salt will grant this time; the shark will bite with “Oh! The offer finishes today”).  For online offers, if I’m reading the script and feel like I’m being drawn in, I take ten minutes, twenty minutes, an hour, or whatever is needed to walk away, have a coffee or tea and really think about what is on offer:  Will I use the product or information?  Do I need it?  Do I need it now?  I try to be very much aware of the ‘call to action’ line that so many marketers add to their copy: “Buy now!”, “Why wait?”, “Do it now?”, “Can you afford to wait?”  The answer in nine out of ten cases is nearly always “Yes I can thank you!”
3. If I am going to ‘Buy Now; Pay Later’ I make sure I have the money in the bank and transfer it to an account where I won’t access it until payment day.  That way, I benefit from the interest and from the peace of mind of knowing that the money is there, ready to do its job when needed.
4. If I’m shopping for larger or more expensive items I try to take someone with me who is not emotionally involved in the sale and can see things more objectively.  If they’ve got experience in the field of what I’m buying, all the better.  But their role is one of being objective; seeing things as they really are, without getting involved emotionally.  You’d be surprised how much easier it is to say “No” when you have someone with you who can help focus on what is going on without themselves being involved.  Marketers and salesmen know that the strongest pull on people comes not from facts but when our emotions are engaged. They craft their copy and words to appeal to our emotions whilst bypassing our reason and logic.  Reason/logic combined with emotions are a powerful force for common sense and keeping out of unnecessary transactions!

I know this may seem obvious but if it worked every time, many salesmen and online marketers would be out of a job.  They know our vulnerabilities and target them.

Enjoy shopping; buy books, read them and apply their knowledge; enjoy the bargains; benefit from ‘once in a lifetime offers’ but do so from a position of security and control. 

And if all else fails and you’re not sure, practice saying “No”.  The world will rarely come to an end if you do miss a bargain.

Until next time …

KudoSurf Me!

UK Government Does It Again!

I just read with interest how, once again, our UK government have proceeded to make decisions that affect the wider British public … without consulting the wider British public.

In their wisdom, they have appointed the head of a ‘successful’ inner city school to help decide on sex education for 5 year-olds and upwards. 

Great!  But why was there no public discussion or canvassing of opinion before such a wide-ranging decision was made?

Why? 

It seems that with alarming regularity, our politicians are making sweeping and increasingly significant decisions about the UK, from the safety of their ivory tower and without getting their hands dirty by asking some serious questions of the people that put them in power.

Perhaps it’s because they are afraid: afraid to face issues that others really care about and actually carry feelings that go against the politically correct norm (whatever that is).  Abortion bills rushed through ‘because of lack of time’.  What a great reflection on our society that we don’t have time to discuss the very thing that makes society live … life.  Please tell me what’s more important … MP’s salaries?  Christmas dinner?  The new car?  Choice of buffet lunch? 

Or is it that they genuinely don’t care?  Have they lost sight of reality?  Are they unreachable?   Do they weild too much power without true accountability?  Are they amoral?

Or do we keep quiet on issues that need to be raised and debated?

Yes! I am cynical.

We’re told, “Be polite”, “Don’t cause trouble”, “Enter into honest discussion.”  

But I ask, “When is this really reciprocated?”   My answer is, ‘Near to Election Time’ when they really fear the consequences of public apathy and the possibility of not getting back into power; when they need our support.  That’s when issues suddenly open up for ‘public debate and discussion’!  But until then, we have to put up with minority groups who shout loudest or carry a disproportionate amount of power dictating what the average person in the UK suffers, shaping a ‘future for all’ which does not include all and is far from rosy.

Come on Westminster!  Please stop insulting and fearing the electorate that put you in power and speak to us. 

And if it’s just good old British arrogance you suffer from … get a life and face reality. 

There’s more to this country than your parliamentary careers and public image.  Spin may flow smoothly from the doctors’ lips, but at some stage you will be taken down by the whirlpool it creates. 

Why can’t we have some transparency and accountability?  Or is there just too much to hide?

There is nothing to fear in open debate unless the fear is what will be seen by debating openly.

Beauty in Unexpected Places

Sometimes we find beauty in the most unexpected places!

Illusions

Sometimes the things we see as solid are just an illusion; step on them or touch them and we discover that they have no foundation.

Sunset or Sunrise

As the sun sets on us it rises on others; just because we can no longer see it does not mean that it has ceased to exist.

Thought For Today

Sometimes the most profound answers are in the simplest of observations.

 

Light Reveals

Shine the right light on a situation and we begin tosee things we have never seen before.

Emotional Engagement: A Key To Success & Failure

I have seen many bands play that somehow ‘miss the mark’ when it comes to holding my attention, making me feel good or simply enjoying what they’re doing.

They may have the most technically competent and capable musicians but it just doesn’t work.

Why?

Perhaps because they are so far into the technical aspects and musical integrity that they miss the key point of engaging their audience; they don’t hit the emotional level; they don’t stir people. Sometimes they play good music but fail to put on a show.

Music is just one aspect of life where we can confuse knowing something with being able to do it.

We may have the best qualifications, the best technical awareness, the highest level of training … but if we’re dealing with people we must be able to operate and engage them emotionally too.

This set me thinking about emotional engagement.

It is a highly complex process on which many papers and books have been written, but I think we can break it down into a few simple areas for the sake of this blog.

Emotional engagement is about acknowledging that others exist and have a point of view: When we allow others to have their say and express their point of view, we allow them to enter into a dialogue and to feel that they have (and what they say has) value.

I believe it’s also about capturing their interest; it is very difficult to participate with any level of sincerity in something that bores you.

I think the word ‘sincerity’ also plays a key part here. People do not engage, in fact they often shy away, if they feel they are being conned (or scammed according to more modern terminology). Nobody likes to think they are being taken for a ride or for granted.

‘Emotional’ involves feelings, those parts of us which so often determine our response to situations. If we engage with people in a way that produces a positive set of feelings, we stand a chance of taking them with us and getting their attention. Conversely, negative feelings will often kill our chances before we start and make it difficult in future. We must gain their trust.

Many people I meet in business are so focussed on what they are trying to sell me (be that a product, service or themselves) that they fail to engage me. Not surprisingly, my response is usually negative and I’m also wary on future encounters if they occur. The most successful people I meet (in business & in life generally) are those who treat me as a person or a friend and show an interest in me; a sale is so much easier based on trust … and so is a lasting relationship.

Businesses spend billions each year on increasing sales, often using slogans like ‘people buy people not products‘ but then fail to deliver. Perhaps it’s because we as a human race are becoming very egotistical and self-centred, becoming blinkered to the needs of others and just looking after ‘number one’. That is a short-term goal with long-term consequences; isolation, mistrust, inability to engage emotionally …. and that does not bode well for personal life or society as a whole.

People really do buy people but that will only happen as we begin to look beyond ourselves to the needs of others. After all, how can we sell to a market that we don’t know or understand or try to meet needs about which we know nothing or have not seen.

Beginning to apply emotional engagement in our lives can only enhance whatever we do and it will make our day (and the day of the people we meet) more pleasurable and fulfilling.

… and if you’re a musician and things aren’t happening, ask yourself why? Is it because you’re not engaging the audience (or is it simply because you are playing speed metal in a folk club)?

Until next time …

Short-Term Gain or Long-Term Vision?

Pre-emptive strikes are seen as crucial in winning tactical advantage over an enemy. Hit them when and where they least expect it; weaken their defences and resistance; walk in.

How often do we run our lives (and our businesses) on this model?

In the short-term we gain ground, competitive advantage, victory over our opposition, but do we benefit in the longer-term?

I think the answer is a resounding “No!“

So many of today’s gurus, advertising messages, even cultural opinion focuses on short-term gain; “I want it & I want it now!” It doesn’t matter how we get it, we just get it. We develop an unhealthy disregard for others, often achieving at their expense, trampling over anyone who gets in our way, even sowing lies or rumour to undermine those we see as a threat. 

And if we get what we’re after, what then?

The truth is that we’re rarely content; we want more and at this stage the people around us can all too easily become ‘the competition’. It’s a vicious circle; in striving for our goal we lose sight of what we have … and frequently, who we are. We keep running and gaining until it stops (either through choice or imposition of others or circumstances).

And if we reach the top, what then?

We often feel obliged to carry on fighting to keep the poll position. But at some stage we will be overtaken by someone or something else, at which stage we are likely to be left on our own with few if any friends (by this stage, even the die-hards will have fallen away).

So what’s the alternative?

I believe we steer ourselves towards a much healthier position by looking at longer-term strategies and aims; strategies and aims that include others, either as colleagues or partners. A roadmap cannot show every hazard we may encounter on a journey but it does show us how to reach our destination. In the same way, long-term plans cannot predict every challenge we may face, but they do help us to achieve our goals and to achieve those goals intact, with friends. 

The problem of using the pre-emptive strike approach for our personal lives and business is that it not only weakens our networks and support, isolating us from the help we need, it also reduces our quality of life and ultimately, our health.

One thing I have learnt is that it is much more enjoyable and much less stressful for myself and others, when I look at the ultimate destination rather than just planning for the next town along the road.

Choosing the best destination and best route? That is a whole subject in itself!

What Happens When We Fail?

We live in an age of dichotomy; on one hand we are told we need to take risks, but if we do and then fail, we run the risk of everybody (Press, boss, company, even family) pointing the finger in accusation.

People inherently hate risk because they fear failure; not because it’s a bad thing to fail, but because of the reaction of others.

We forget that the greatest inventions, such as electric light, came after many, many failures. Our age shouts, “We need it now!” yet inventions, businesses, almost anything of value takes care, effort, passion and above all time to develop.

However, even if we have support around us, failure is rarely easy to handle.

But there must be some way of handling failure or many of the inventions we have would never have come into being.

Perhaps part of it is being able (and willing to learn from our mistakes or failures.

• How could we have done better?
• What decisions did we make that led us to where we are?

Perhaps part of it is the conviction that we have something special that is needed/will succeed.

Perhaps part of it simply the determination to learn and try again.

Perhaps part of it is no more than an ability to shake off the dust and try again.

My own personal failures have ranged from relationships, to sports, to inability to organise my life, to personal goals. Any success I have enjoyed following my failures has been through a combination of a desire to do it again (but better) or to make a change in behaviour. A major factor in achieving these revised goals has been to enlist the support of people I trust and people that I know can help me or my situation.

Unfortunately, many of the great inventors are no longer with us to ask, but some are. People like James Dyson have written about their failures in books and articles, from which we can learn a great deal.

However, I also believe that anyone (and everyone) who has failed can help another.

The problem is that there seems to be no forum in which we ‘failures‘ can openly contribute. Perhaps that’s a Facebook page/forum for the near future.

In the meantime, if you’ve experienced failure and are willing to share some of your experiences and how you recovered or overcame these, on this blog, thank you and that would be a great start.

We Can’t Do Everything Ourselves

I love Easter as it reminds me that I am incapable of doing everything myself; sometimes I just have to let someone else help me!

The problem is that many of us see accepting help as failure because we’ve been indoctrinated to think that accepting help = weakness! Unfortunately, many of the individuals I’ve met who promote this line of thinking are the most insecure people I’ve come across and the very ones that need the help they shun.

As human beings, we operate best in communities and that involves communication and relationship.

Relationship is a lot more than a simple ‘we like each other‘; relationship is something much stronger and something which continues even when we find liking each other difficult. Relationship is two-way and implicit in that is helping each other. It’s so liberating to accept that we can’t do everything ourselves and to realise that working with others shows much more ‘courage‘ on our part than it does ‘failure‘.

The right kind of relationships also help us to put together many pieces of a jigsaw puzzle that would otherwise be impossible, to make sense out of confusion and to make good out of bad.

Please don’t misinterpret this as ‘relationships are everything‘; they’re not. We need to take responsibility for what we are and what we do etc, but in a World that tries to promote the ultimate goal as being self-sufficient, self-made and self-gratifying, it’s good to adopt a counter-culture which demonstrates that working together and admitting we need or want help achieves so much more ( and in the process, we create a more holistic society where we begin to matter to each other).

So, amongst the bunnies, eggs and chicks this Easter time, let’s remember that we can’t do everything ourselves and when we ask for help we can achieve and enjoy so much of what we previously thought was impossible.

Be The Encouragement Others Need

If you’re like me, you’ll have days where it would be so helpful to receive a bit of encouragement from another person.

It isn’t that we walk around craving encouragement as a profession, it’s just that some days take their toll on our confidence and self-esteem and to have someone say, “That’s great, thanks!” or “You’ve really helped me” or “You’re very good at what you do” or sometimes simply “Thank you” makes all the difference and gives us a little boost to keep going.

This is true in our personal lives and business dealings.

If we feel this way, I’m guessing that there are many many people who feel the same. In fact I would go so far as to say encouragement is basic human need.

So, why not make it your aim to encourage one other person today, whether they are someone you know or a stranger . They may help you at work, the shops, in the street, or at school.

It’s often easier to encourage those we like, but harder to encourage those who may be a pain, yet it is often the latter who need the encouragement most and in whom it will have the greatest effect.

“Thank you” is a powerful phrase, sadly neglected in today’s ‘I want it; it’s my right‘ sick culture. This simple phrase can spark a complete change in situations and lives … and if you can offer a bit of fee practical help too, all the better.

So, does it work or is it theory?

I remember an account of a man called Tony Campolo who went out to a late night café as he was working long hours. In the cafe was a girl in her mid-twenties, made-up to the eyeballs and clearly working the streets. He spoke to her briefly and bought her a coffee. The conversation didn’t last long before the girl left. Talking to the cafe owner he learned that she came in every night and in the next few days it was her birthday. He quickly organised a party for her and took in a simple birthday cake with candles on top. As she walked in they all said Happy Birthday and presented the cake.  She stood staring at the cake and said nothing then burst into tears. As her story unfolded  he learned this was the first birthday cake or party she’d ever had.

We can’t all go into cafés and make birthday cakes for strangers, but this story showed me that we never really know who we’re talking to and what a difference our simple words or actions can make.

So try it; you may not receive lots of reciprocated gratitude but you will know that you’re making a positive difference in a World that needs it.

And at this time of the message of encouragement, I wish you a very Happy Easter!